Although he loathed and detested it, Dracula went Christmas shopping. Undoubtedly every year, he was given thoughtful and generous gifts from his dearest friends. This year he was not going to be the Grinch, even though that was his natural inclination.

For the banshee, he found a lovely cashmere shawl (if she was going to wail and scream, she might as well do it in style). Frankenstein wasn’t getting anything because he was a junkie asshole and would most definitely just sell whatever gift he received for some smack. Dracula did get the Bride a little something since he was sure Frankenstein wouldn’t bother. His choice in gifts were swift and without trepidation, all except for the ghost. Finding the gift that would be just right for her would take a bit more thought and consideration.

He ran through a mental list of all of the material things he could imagine her to ever want and although he was sure of a few, especially one in particular, he just couldn’t make that purchase.

So he bought her a blender instead.